Eleven-Twelve.

On this night, I will let you hold my wrists,
I believe they are tiny in the palms of your hands.
I am learning the shape of your lips as you kiss my knuckles,
the spots where strangers filled me to the brim with salt water.
The skin has turned plum colored, as if it knows it has been had.
Tonight there is no trespassing, there is no knowing, no insiders.
You choose not to be reckless, choose instead to take care.
Listen to the story of the ache between my ribs, where it all came undone.
See in this girl's spine where marrow once lived, now glass,
and you know there is no breaking her, not bone or heart.

May 17, 2011

"I'm not on the run, I am matching the big boys, one for one..."

What's playing through those annoying as F earbuds during my workouts this week:

Trevor Hall [feat. Matisyahu] - Unity
The XX - Intro
George Michael - Freedom
Eddie Vedder - No More
TV on the Radio - Wolf Like Me
Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Heads Will Roll
Cold War Kids - Skip The Charades
Band of Horses - The Great Salt Lake
Third Eye Blind - Graduate
Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself
Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
Fitz & The Trantrums - MoneyGrabber
Silversun Pickups - Substitution
Jeff Buckley - Last Goodbye
John Frusciante - Murders
Ben Harper - Black Rain
Tori Amos - Girl
Warpaint - Beetles
The Sundays - This Is Where The Story Ends
Ani DiFranco - Shameless
Rage Against The Machine - Killing In The Name
Kings of Leon - Radioactive
Lykke Li - Get Some
Matt & Kim - Lessons Learned
Smashing Pumpkins - Hummer

Crying Mix. [It really exists]

Times are fragile, kids. So are my tear ducts. Music heals? Maybe. It definitely helps. I got in my car while leaving the bookstore this afternoon and turned on my iPod to find "Crying Mix" glaring back at me. We laughed, we rolled out eyes. There are songs that make us cry. We break up, we make up, we celebrate, we appreciate...you feel me? I think you do. Using some of the songs from the actual "Crying Mix" and adding a few I'm going to share it with you now. Grab a tissue, turn this shit up loud, and cry it out. It is going to be okay. I promise.

Patty Griffin - Let Him Fly
Damien Rice - Cold Water
R.E.M. - You Are The Everything
Daniel Ahearn - I Will Let You Go
Anais Mitchell - Changer
Brandi Carlile - Josephine
Jeff Buckley - Last Goodbye
José González - Heartbearts
Johnathan Rice - The Acrobat
Mumford & Sons - White Blank Page
Third Eye Blind - The Background
Tori Amos - Tear In My Hand
R.E.M. - Nightswimming
Tracy Champman - The Promise
Adele - Someone Like You
Josh Ritter - Change Of Time
Bon Iver - Brackett, WI
Brand New - Play Crack The Sky
The Sundays - Wild Horses
Coldplay - The Scientist

I am not a writer.

I cup you in my hands,
place an ear against the skin of your back.
Beat after beat of pitch perfect heart sounds, 
somewhere in between I remember who I used to be,
and how we arrived here.
We lie with lies in your bed,
and with the hours.
Within them I am convinced this is enough,
until I feel you waste part after part,
the freckles on my chest,
the laugh in my belly,
the stories that make me breathe.
I crawl from your bed,
press my feet against the cold,
I wash your salt water taste from my tongue to forget you.
You must know this,
you were a sometimes, a stranger.
You are now made of words: delicate, ferocious, unkind.
You have become the turn of a key,
the sound of driving away.